Alaska

I ran to these hills with my feet, my skin and heart aflame, from the assuaging, consistent heat of a florida summer to the constant conductivity generated by the pursuit of a single goal that has smothered your vision, clouded your mind. when you are engaged fully in something, for so long, that the thing becomes you, that you are that thing, that boat that house that dream that concept, that is where i lay. i craved nothing more than a transition from the monotony of my present existence, from the drudgery of pretending as though I had utter control over my own existence, to a place where nothing would be familiar. And, instead, utter familiarity has nearly bowled me over. A pin of many, I have been here my whole life. 

You never can tell.

Cold, Hot. They are relative. Bliss, Shame. Wind, Calm. Beauty, Fear. Ambition, Ignorance. Success, failure. One is nothing without the other. 

Someone walks in the door, a casual conversation about hunting bear, fishing for halibut. A grizzled mat of grey. A glacier in the distance pours itself between two mountain peaks, the wind carries the cloud bank across the vast bay of blue. A guitar plucks softly while the chickens peck the remnants of grilled corn, a rift in the outside word. This place is a secret, not to be shared with everyone. People can exist here, with nothing to prove to themselves or to each other. We all work hard and we all know our skills. There is no dirt that is unwelcome, it has equal point and purpose as everything else, and it is hallelujah. 

The seeds of change are falling like snow. it is not that cold, yet, but it is coming. We have been sitting on porches, in living rooms, in bars and in coffee shops, talking. What is the point of this, all this? I wave my hand across the horizon, take a deep breath. I have been reading about the Raven. She is the messenger of the Void. She is the harbinger of mystery, the executor of the realm of nothing and everything. Black covered in iridescence, there is no dark when all the colors of the world are hidden within the depths. The entire spectrum. She will follow your gaze as you look past her, just as I follow the gaze of those I love who are uninterested in aligning their path with my own. Look at them, Go! Go, you are beautiful. Do whatever you are doing.

Just make sure you can breathe.

I step outside. Look at the sky. Look at the mountains. Look at the people I have yet to meet, consider the path that led me here. Feel my stomach, full enough. Full my heart, happy and whole. The air is crisp and clean, the options are limitless. This is good. 

Got a lot of lost time on the shoes of my soul, 

Yeah, the light at the end of the tunnel isn't really a light

If we got any closer we would find that it's only a mirror

Reflecting our search lamps, here in the darkness, here in the homeland

We'll always be searching for permanence in quicksand

And frenzied collecting things that we just can't hold.